


I Know It Breaks Your Heart

by euphowolf



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Bars, F/F, Future Fic, Hotel Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-14
Updated: 2017-06-14
Packaged: 2018-11-13 23:27:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11195691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/euphowolf/pseuds/euphowolf
Summary: "four years, no calls/now you're looking pretty in a hotel bar/and I can't stop/no, I can't stop"





	I Know It Breaks Your Heart

**Author's Note:**

> So I dislike the Chainsmokers intensely, but I like "Closer" for one reason and that reason is the specific lyrics in the summary for this fic. Don't those lines just scream NicoMaki? They did to me, anyway, so now I have the deeply unpleasant task of admitting that I wrote a fic inspired by the Chainsmokers. My mortification knows no bounds (apologies if you happen to be a fan of them).

Nico was having a terrible day.

First, she’d had to wake up at the crack of dawn to catch a flight, because  _ apparently _ bigshot photographers couldn’t just take a photo  _ anywhere _ . Then, when they  got to the airport, she had found out that her stupid flight had been delayed due to an engine failure. She had had to wait for hours as her agent scrambled to book her another flight. To top it all off, when they had finally arrived at the photographer’s studio, he had taken one look at her and shook his head dramatically.

“ _ Mon dieu! _ ” he had shouted. “Those bags under your eyes! Oh, no, this will not do at all. No makeup in this world could cover up those horrors!”

Nico’s agent had to physically restrain her from running over to him and giving him a  _ real _ horror to scream at. She made plans to reschedule the photoshoot while Nico fumed behind her, and they took a taxi to their hotel. 

“Why does it have to be this photographer again?” Nico complained during the ride. Her agent sighed and gave her the explanation once more. 

“Every girl he’s photographed has been featured on the cover of a major fashion magazine. It’s a crucial step in taking your personal brand to the next level and gaining visibility.”

Nico pouted and stared out the window, the orange lights of the lamps lining the road casting shadows over her face as they whizzed by. She knew, of course, that she was being childish in taking it out on someone who was only trying to help, but it was so hard to be on her best behavior when she was tired as all hell. She kept her mouth shut the rest of the way, and her agent knew better than to attempt conversation. When they finally got to their hotel, Nico stepped out of the taxi and surveyed it approvingly while her agent paid the driver. She had hand-picked this hotel herself, even though it was rather expensive, because it was classy and, as a result, known for its discretion. 

“Take the rest of the night off. I'll just be at the bar,” she said, nodding at the woman next to her. When the agent side-eyed her dubiously, she insisted, “I'll be fine!”

They parted ways after checking in and Nico made a beeline for the bar. The patrons were mostly middle-aged businessmen who weren't trashy enough to go to a strip club but  _ were _ trashy enough to get wasted in the lobby of a fancy hotel. Nico took an empty seat next to one and the bartender materialized immediately. 

She ordered a Cosmopolitan because she wanted fruit but she also wanted the hard taste of vodka in her mouth. She sipped it idly, letting the cool liquid roll down her throat while she browsed the internet on her phone. These three years she spent working to make a name for herself had been everything she wanted in some ways, and everything she had never expected in others. Still, it felt incredibly good to be drinking expensive alcohol in a five-star hotel and to not even have to think about the cost. She was by no means a national star, but she had earned enough of a following that she could treat herself on occasion. And God knows, she deserved some self-pampering now.

Swirling the remains of her drink around, Nico wondered when she should go up to her room. The photoshoot was set for the afternoon, so she had no reason to turn in early. Her lip curled in distaste at the thought of posing in front of the rude photographer. She was in no hurry for tomorrow to break. 

As she called for another, different drink, she heard the clack of heels behind her. Some woman took a seat on the other side of the man Nico was sitting next to, although his hunched posture made it difficult for Nico to catch a glimpse of her. Nico couldn't be bothered to peer around him, even if she was curious about what sort of woman besides herself would be riding solo at a fancy hotel bar so late at night. The bartender dropped off Nico's drink, then stepped to the side to take the other woman's order.

“Bloody Mary,” the woman said, and then Nico  _ had _ to turn around, because who would willingly down such a repulsive beverage? The man sitting next to her slumped forward a little, just enough for Nico to get a good look - and when she did, her stomach lurched.

The girl was extremely pretty, with soft-looking red hair and gorgeously long legs, but that wasn't why Nico nearly spit out her drink. She was wearing a casual, purple dress that clung to every curve, and the way she distractedly traced the rim of her glass with one delicate finger was quite attractive, but that wasn't the reason either. 

No, the reason Nico found herself staring wide-eyed at the girl two seats down was because she knew that face - because the last time she had seen that face, it had been twisted into an expression of anguish and anger and who knows what else as the girl it belonged to told Nico that they couldn't keep seeing each other anymore. 

The girl sitting a scant six feet away from her was Maki Nishikino.

Nico was unable to do anything else but stare for at least a solid minute, and in that time, Maki turned her head and looked straight at her. The corners of her mouth folded down in a frown of budding recognition as she scanned Nico's face. Her lips parted slightly, and Nico at least had the distant satisfaction of seeing that Maki had also been caught by complete surprise.

“Nico?” the other girl finally said, the tilt upwards in tone making it more a question than a statement. A million things to say flashed through Nico's mind all at once: “hey,” or “I missed you,” or “why didn't you ever answer my texts?”

What came out of her mouth instead was a very rude, very sarcastic, “Do I know you?”

Maki sat back, looking scandalized. “I know you know who I am,” she said, although a bit uncertainly. Confusion and hurt clouded her features, and Nico felt equally gratified and guilty. 

Unable to stop herself, she replied, “No, I don't think so. But it does look like you're the type who would leave a girl hanging for four years without warning. So maybe you should stop talking to me?” The words poured out like the alcohol that had splashed into her wine glass. Her ears were filled with a strange ringing noise as she turned away pointedly, taking a deep swallow of her drink. The memories she had worked so hard to lock away were all crashing back in now, leaving her mind in turmoil.

The man sitting between them straightened up a little. He was obviously too drunk to read the mood and seemed thrilled that two attractive women were on either side of him. 

“Hey beautiful,” he slurred at Maki. “She might not know you, but I sure as hell want to.”  Maki scooted further away from him, her hands gripping the rim of the stool she was sitting on. 

Nico scoffed. “Don't bother,” she advised. She felt like she was speaking underwater; everything sounded so far away. In the back of her mind, she could tell that she was probably almost as drunk as the man next to her. She plunged on, unperturbed, making defiant eye contact with Maki. “That girl's an ice queen.”

Maki's eyes narrowed into slits. “I see you haven’t changed at all,” she spat. She had curled her hands into tight fists, her knuckles white.

“And I see you’re still ordering the same shitty drinks,” Nico retorted. She took another sip of  _ her _ very refined tequila and lime.

The businessman between them, looking very disoriented but still very eager, tried again, this time with Nico. “Well then,” he said, putting a large paw over her hand, “how about you and me get to know each other a little?”

Nico smiled her sweetest smile, and the man gave her a toothy grin. “If you don’t get your hand off of me by the end of this sentence,” she grated, her voice equal parts honey and malice, enunciating every word carefully, “I’ll scream and security will kick your drunk ass so thoroughly you’ll be cured of the constipation you so clearly have.” 

The man jerked back so fast he nearly fell out of his chair. He sat there looking quite dejected and mumbling under his breath for a few minutes, and when Nico gave him another glare, he put his head down, paid his bill, and slunk away. By then, the bar was beginning to clear out, the hotel guests returning to their rooms or wandering off. 

Nico wanted to go to her room too; she had woken up so early, and nothing sounded better than a hot bubble bath and rest. She would be damned, however, if she left before Maki and let her think she had chased her off. She gritted her teeth and instead ordered a third drink, this time a mango mojito. Maki, too, ordered a second Bloody Mary, and the two sat there in silence, angled away from each other. 

Nico made a pretense of checking her phone, although she couldn’t keep herself from glancing over the top of her screen to inspect Maki. The girl was thinner than when she had last seen her. She looked more vulnerable, more weary than Nico had remembered her being. She watched intently as Maki sipped at her straw, following the bob of her pale throat as she swallowed. 

“Will you  _ stop _ staring at me?” Maki’s voice shocked Nico out of her reverie. She jumped in her seat and averted her eyes guiltily.

“Who would stare at  _ you _ ?” she responded reflexively. “You're so full of yourself.”

Maki just shook her head. The two lapsed back into silence again, which Nico was starting to find unbearable. She cleared her throat awkwardly, and Maki’s eyes flicked up to look at her. 

“Why are you here?” she muttered, cringing a little at the palpable reluctance in her voice. The room seemed unnaturally hot, most likely due to the copious amount of alcohol she had consumed. She knew that if she didn't stop soon, she'd either wake up with a killer hangover or do something  _ really _ stupid. Maybe even both.

Maki looked baffled by the sudden question, but she answered anyway. “There's a neurosurgeon summit being held in this hotel,” she explained. She twirled at the ends of her hair self-consciously as she spoke, and a strange, inexplicable urge to either cry or laugh rose up in Nico's throat at the sight of that familiar gesture. “It's going on all weekend. Why are  _ you _ here?”

“Work,” replied Nico evasively. “Not that you would know what I'm up to these days.” 

“I -” Maki started, then bit her lip. She stirred her drink with the straw, watching the red contents swirl around and stain the glass. “You're right. I wouldn't know.”

Silence fell between them again. Nico's eyes bounced from Maki's fingers gripping the straw to Maki's lips, scarlet from the Bloody Mary. She watched as Maki's tongue flicked out to catch a stray bead of her drink at the corner of her mouth. She wished the redhead would just go already so she could also stumble back to her own room and collapse into the bed. Maki seemed to be having the same thought because she kept on stealing glances at Nico and tapping her fingernail against her glass. 

“Shouldn't you get going soon?” Nico suggested hopefully. Maki arched one, offended eyebrow, then called the bartender over and ordered another drink.

“We close in thirty minutes, miss,” he reminded her as he poured out tomato juice into a glass. Nico admired how professional he remained despite the fact that they were obviously preventing him from shutting down the bar, and she told herself she would tip him well. Of course, that was hardly  _ her _ fault; if Maki wasn’t so stubborn, they both could have been long gone at this point. 

Nico crossed and recrossed her legs, yawning a little. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Maki tense up, and she had a brief, crazy thought that Maki was  _ nervous _ about being there. Internally, she ran through the possible reasons, but she gave up quickly. Maki was too hard to read - and she was also a little too intoxicated at the moment to puzzle it out. She placed a hand against the cool wood of the bar and traced at the blemishes with one finger, hoping to stay awake with the motion.

She nearly jumped off her stool when Maki reached across and firmly grabbed her hand, trapping it still against the table. She looked up, startled, to see an oddly pained expression on the other girl's face. 

“Stop,” rasped Maki, her voice so low it was more like a growl. Nico jerked her arm away, her skin tingling with warmth from where Maki had touched it. Belatedly, she realized that was the first physical contact with Maki she had had in over four years. 

“What is your problem?” Nico demanded. 

Maki raised her hand and combed it through her red hair, exhaling audibly. “I don't know what you're trying to do,” she warned, “but you need to cut it out.”

Nico had no idea what Maki was referring to and she opened her mouth to say just that. Before she could, however, she finally noticed the strange heat in Maki's eyes, the way her lips were parted and her cheeks were flushed. It was just the alcohol, right? A chill ran down Nico's spine, cutting through the cloud of intoxication in her brain. 

Maki averted her gaze, redirecting it to a fixed point among the bottles displayed behind the counter. She leaned forward, her elbows on either side of her drink, and Nico’s eyes were drawn to the shifting of her shoulder blades, clearly visible due to her backless dress. An inexplicable impulse to press a hand between them and feel the supple skin flashed through Nico's mind, and she reeled back, shaking her head vigorously to get rid of it. 

“What's with the fancy dress, anyway?” she asked, a little too loudly. Maki glanced down, as if only then realizing what she was wearing. She shrugged vaguely. 

“There was… some gala.” Her tone seemed detached, almost clinical. Nico wondered if she spoke to her patients in the same way. “After the conference. I left early. Middle-aged men hitting on me.” There was a pause between each incomplete sentence, as if she was only thinking in fragments. 

“So you came here to get drunk alone? Sounds like a reasonable thing to do.” The words came out more goading than Nico intended, but it was too late to take them back. 

“Yes.  _ Alone _ ,” emphasized Maki. She gave Nico a pointed glare, which Nico threw right back. She was tired, tired of Maki’s stupid attitude and her stupid Bloody Mary’s and her stupid, perfect, soft-looking hair. 

Fine then,” Nico hissed. “I’ll  _ leave _ , and you can enjoy the last five minutes before the bar closes by yourself.” She grabbed her purse and stood up, anger simmering in her chest. She no longer cared about the petty game they were playing, seeing who would leave first. All she wanted was to be free from Maki’s presence, and her searching, knowing eyes. She rummaged around, looking for her wallet so she could pay for her drinks and swaying a little on the heels she probably would not have worn if she had known she was going to consume so much alcohol. 

“Wait!” Maki got to her feet suddenly, catching herself against the bar when she stumbled. She clutched Nico’s wrist so tightly that it actually hurt a little. 

Nico was a lot of things: adorable, kind, generous, humble. Even a perfect being like her, however, had limits, and her patience at that moment was about to wear thin. Reminding herself that, while it was very late and the hotel lobby was nearly deserted, they were still in public, she took a deep, shuddering breath and let it out slowly.

“What do you want from me, Maki?” Maki looked caught off-guard by Nico’s simple question. Nico pressed into her hesitation, continuing, “We haven’t seen each other in 4 years. You cut me off with no explanation. You broke my heart and never looked back. And  _ now _ you want to talk?”

Maki licked her lips, but it was several long seconds before she finally answered. “I don’t want to talk,” she whispered. 

Nico blew out her cheeks in frustration. “Well, what the hell  _ do _ you want, then?”

“This.” Maki took two steps forward and pressed her mouth to Nico’s.

All the air went out of Nico’s lungs. The world seemed to grind to a halt. She tried to react - push Maki away, lean back, anything - but every muscle in her body seemed frozen solid. Maki’s lips felt hard and soft all at once against her own, just like when they had kissed the first time, inexperienced teenagers bumping together so awkwardly their teeth had clashed. There was no such jarring impact now, no painful click of tooth against tooth - only heat and desperation and the throb of her own, heavy heart. She wasn't even sure when her lips started moving in response, but she found herself kissing Maki back just as fiercely.

Sometime between a millisecond and an eternity, the two broke apart. Maki still had a vice-like grip on Nico's wrist, and both of them were breathing heavily. The taste of vodka and tomatoes lingered on Nico's tongue, like Maki's personal signature was scrawled all over her own lips. They locked eyes, Maki's violet drinking in Nico's red.

“My room?” asked Maki, her hand tightening around Nico's wrist so much that Nico could feel her pulse beating erratically against those slender pianist fingers. 

Nico was so breathless that it took all of her just to choke out a nearly inaudible “Yes.” She fished out a $100 bill - more than enough to pay for both her and Maki's drinks - and placed it on the countertop for the bartender without even looking. Maki's eyes followed the movement of her arm, then flicked hungrily back to her face. A wordless understanding passed between them, and Maki led the way to the elevators. 

The elevator doors slid smoothly open with a rush of air as soon as Maki jabbed at the call buttons. Nico noted distantly that they were going to the 14th floor of the hotel, though the bulk of her attention was directed at how nice Maki’s perfume smelled in the enclosed space. The redhead had not loosened her hold on Nico, as if she was afraid that the older girl would run off given the nearest opportunity. 

Generic elevator jazz drifted in the background as they ascended. It sounded unnaturally loud to Nico, and she glanced at the girl beside her, hoping she would break the silence. Maki, however, was gazing up, watching the numbers change as they passed floor after floor. She didn’t know what to do, but she knew that if she thought about it too hard she would start panicking. Instead, she tried to relax back into the comfortable haze of intoxication, willing herself to stop thinking and simply  _ feel _ . 

The elevator dinged as they arrived at the 14th floor, and Maki was out the doors before they were even finished closing, Nico in tow. She practically dragged Nico down the seemingly unending, carpeted hallway, her strides so long that Nico had trouble keeping up. If she was in a better state of mind, Nico would have complained, but she was preoccupied with other concerns now that her initial shock was wearing off.

“H-Hey,” she ventured weakly as Maki halted them in front of room 1423. Maki, in the act of pulling out her room key, swiveled her head to look at Nico. Nico swallowed, her face feeling unbearably hot. “Can we just… slow down for a sec…” She had so many questions, and not one moment of this night was making any sense to her. 

“Nico,” Maki said slowly and carefully, and Nico's heart fluttered at the sound of her own name. “We are both here for only one reason, and you are nowhere near drunk enough to pretend you don't know what it is.” She slid the card key into its slot and withdrew, the green light above the handle blinking briefly to life. The redhead cracked open the door and turned to look challengingly over her shoulder. In that moment, she looked to Nico like the Maki she remembered - the snobby, yet strangely thoughtful Maki, the dangerously beautiful Maki, the Maki who managed to get under her skin and drive her to do really, really  _ idiotic _ things. 

It was Nico who initiated the kiss this time, rushing forward before she could tell herself to stop and think. Maki met her lips eagerly, pivoting to wrap her arms around Nico’s neck as they stumbled backwards into the room. Nico kicked off her heels in the general vicinity of the entrance, thanking whatever guardian angel had convinced her to wear ones without straps that day. The door swung closed behind them, the sliver of light from the hallway disappearing, and there was nothing but moonlit darkness and lips upon lips and a hot thrill shooting through every vein in Nico’s body. 

On a subconscious level, Nico knew even as she was fumbling with the zipper on the back of Maki’s dress that she was breaking every rule she had made for herself years back, when it had been the eighth day in a row she had cried herself to sleep. All those months of hard work, all the effort that she had put into forgetting Maki existed, was quickly going to waste. But it was easy to vow to never look back when she was hundreds of miles away from her ex-girlfriend and deep into her work as an idol - it was far harder when Maki was moaning Nico’s name over and over into her mouth like a prayer. 

So as Maki shimmied out of her dress and Nico pushed her back onto the bed, shrugging out of her own blouse and skirt, she decided to ignore the last, nagging resistance in her mind. Despite what Maki may have implied, she was just intoxicated enough to blame it all on the alcohol in the morning. 

Her tongue flicked almost curiously into Maki’s mouth, and she could still detect the faint trace of Bloody Mary. Maki murmured in complaint as Nico pulled away.

“You taste like tomatoes,” whispered Nico, unable to keep the laughter out of her voice. Maki shifted under her, pressing a knee up into Nico’s groin. Nico arched her back and let out a startled gasp, grinding her hips down instinctively.

“Stop talking,” Maki growled, and they kissed again, which Nico had to admit was a very good way to make herself shut up. Maki grabbed her by the shoulders as their tongues lay warm against each other, and she rolled them over gently but firmly until she was on top of Nico, the whole of her naked weight pressing into Nico's body.

Nico had almost forgotten the intimate feeling of skin on skin. She could feel Maki's larger breasts, soft and yielding, against her own, pert ones. She knew she was pitifully wet, and that Maki could tell that through her ruined, soaked panties. She rocked her hips, rubbing up against Maki's knee between her legs in a wordless plea for relief. Maki understood immediately and reluctantly broke away from Nico's mouth. She moved to her neck instead, sinking her teeth into the delicate skin as she reached one hand down to take Nico's nipple between her fingers. Nico writhed beneath her as she contemplated grabbing the other girl's hand and guiding it down to where she was aching to be touched. Everything was so hot, and her heart was pounding so loudly in her ears; she felt that if Maki did not go down on her soon, she would probably just up and combust. Maki did not make her wait long, however, and she shuddered as the redhead raked her nails down the side of her body.

Maki traced idle patterns on her hip as she kissed her way downwards. She wasn't shy about using her teeth, and as Nico gasped and flinched with every nip, she realized there would be marks the next day. Vaguely, she remembered the photoshoot she was scheduled to have, but it was difficult to worry about that when Maki was pressing a tongue to her navel, when Maki was lying between her legs and rolling her panties off to toss them carelessly on the floor. She looked down as the other girl paused, and she saw Maki gazing back at her, hunger and desire in her dark eyes. Not breaking eye contact, she slowly lowered her head and pressed a kiss against her slick entrance.

Nico jerked instinctively, but Maki held her steady by her thighs with an almost merciless strength. A low moan escaped Nico's lips as Maki moved her mouth against her, and she placed her hands on Maki's head, tangling her fingers in soft, messy red hair. Maki let her push her lower, adjusting her position as she settled in and continuing to work her lips at Nico's entrance.

“Maki,” Nico whined. She had not called that name in years, but it still felt natural as it fell away from her lips. “Please, Maki, your tongue…” She hated begging, but _ god _ Maki was being unfair. Maki tightened her grip in response, but she only persisted in laying those sweet, slow kisses between Nico's legs. 

Just as Nico was about to push Maki away and just take care of her burning need on her own, Maki dipped her tongue teasingly into Nico's wetness. Nico cried out, clutching Maki's hair, and Maki pushed her tongue in deeper, her nose brushing against Nico's clit as she did so. Nico, unable to control her movements, kicked out, but Maki dug her fingers into her thighs, trapping her. It felt so inhumanly good to have Maki's tongue buried inside of her, pushing and tasting, making obscene sounds in the darkness of the hotel room. 

“ _ Fuck _ , Maki,” she gasped, and she hated how utterly enraptured her own voice sounded. Her hips moved on their own, grinding against Maki's soft, perfect mouth as best they could. She pulled at Maki's hair roughly, and even as the redhead growled against her entrance in complaint, she kept up her pace. In fact, she actually seemed invigorated, and the idea that Maki was actually  _ turned on _ by the pain was so incredibly tantalizing that Nico felt she could come right then and there. 

Maki withdrew briefly, but only to shift upwards and press a hard kiss directly to Nico's clit, her teeth catching at the sensitive bundle of nerves just for a moment. It was enough to almost make Nico scream, and when Maki lifted a hand from her thighs to insert two long fingers into her, she moaned so loudly that she was sure anyone in the adjacent rooms would have heard her. She couldn't even be embarrassed because she was too concentrated on the way Maki dragged heat in and out of her, her fingers curling in and stretching her, filling her up. She was already so on edge, and so willing, that when Maki’s tongue flicked a rough circle against her, it was enough to make every muscle in her body tense up.

A high-pitched whine sounded in Nico's ears, and it took a few seconds to realize it was coming from her own throat. Everything was so hot, so wet, and suddenly she was pushed past a tipping point she had almost forgotten she had. She shivered as she came against Maki's face, clenching around Maki's fingers, which plunged into her relentlessly even as she climaxed. It was far more intense than any orgasm she had experienced touching herself the past four years in the loneliness of her own rooms, and her chest heaved with exertion as she rode out the last shuddering waves.

Maki did not sit up when Nico finally stilled. Nico propped herself up on her elbows a little to look at the redhead, who gazed back at her, her chin resting lightly on Nico’s stomach. Nico found it slightly difficult to breathe, partially because she had just had the best orgasm in recent memory and partially because Maki, naked and bathed in moonlight filtering through the curtains, looked almost ethereal. 

Maki stirred as they made eye contact, and she slowly dragged herself up Nico’s body. Nico lowered her head to meet her lips, and the two kissed, gentler this time and with not quite the same desperation as before. It was almost sweet, and Nico melted a little at the thought that the mouth she was kissing had been between her own legs just a minute earlier. This did not escape Maki’s notice.

“That good, huh?” She pulled away a little, and Nico could almost swear she was smirking. A twinge of annoyance cut through the post-climax haze. Maki had  _ no right _ to be smug. 

“I thought you said no talking,” Nico muttered, and when Maki opened her mouth to respond, she reached between them, past Maki’s downy lower hair, and felt between her folds. Whatever words Maki was about to utter turned into a tortured gasp, and Nico gasped too because she knew Maki would be wet but she didn’t know Maki would be  _ dripping _ . She wondered for a split second if maybe the other girl had somehow already satisfied herself, but when she saw the way Maki bit her lip and pressed backwards into Nico’s touch, she realized that no, Maki was simply just that ready for her. 

“It’s not what you think,” Maki stammered. Nico graciously elected to ignore that comment, even if it was a total, obvious lie. 

“On your back,” she ordered, and was pleased to see how quickly Maki complied. She straddled Maki’s hips, tracing a line with one fingernail down the middle of Maki’s breasts and causing the other girl to arch her back and glare at her, those pretty, angled eyes narrowing. She leaned forward and kissed Maki’s jawline, letting her hands skim the smooth, creamy skin of her waist. Maki shivered beneath her, then grabbed one of Nico’s wrists, pulling it insistently downwards.

“Nico,” she hissed, and Nico smiled into the curve of Maki’s neck. She moved lower and took one pink nipple between her teeth. Maki groaned and parted her legs further, allowing Nico to slip a hand between them. She cupped upwards with her palm and honestly, it was incredibly unfair just how responsive Maki was, tossing her head and clutching at the sheets. How was Nico supposed to resist?

Maki hummed low in her throat as Nico slipped two fingers inside her slick entrance. Maki was so hot and soft, pulling her in with little resistance and clenching around her tightly. The redhead bucked a little, and Nico lifted herself so that Maki could bring her knees up, giving Nico a full view of all of her. Nico needed little prompting and quickly began pumping her fingers forward and back, bringing heat and friction with the motion. 

Maki whimpered to the rhythm of Nico's movements. “Harder,” she begged, her eyelids fluttering closed as she surrendered herself fully to the sensation. Her hair pooled messily against the pillowcase as Nico moved her arm faster. The heel of Nico's hand rubbed against Maki's clit with every thrust, and she knew Maki was already so on edge that she wouldn't take much longer.

“Don't stop,” Maki rasped, her breathing ragged. Nico slammed into her over and over again, not letting up the pace even as Maki grew ever more incoherent. “Yes, just like that, oh  _ god _ Nico, I'm coming, please, Nico I lo-”

Nico leaned in and covered Maki's mouth with her own, swallowing her moans and the words with them. She did not want to hear what Maki had to say, did not want to know how that sentence would have finished. She thrust hard, curling her fingers deep, and Maki cried out in delirious pleasure. Maki’s walls contracted hard around her fingers, and she could tell by the way Maki quivered that she had reached her peak. She kept her hand where it was while Maki rocked her hips against Nico's palm, drawing out the orgasm as long as possible. 

When Maki’s entire body seemed to relax with an air of finality, Nico pulled out and straightened up. She frowned a little as she realized she didn't get to taste Maki in the rush of it all, and she settled for licking the wetness off her fingers. Maki watched her through half-opened eyes, her expression slack and contented. Nico collapsed next to her and stretched out against the silky sheets. They felt cool and luxurious against her own, slightly sweaty skin. 

Maki rolled over on her side to face Nico and snuggled in closer, to Nico's shock. She tucked her head sleepily underneath Nico's chin, her lips brushing against Nico's sternum, and the older girl froze because post-sex cuddling was  _ definitely _ going to lead to disaster and the best thing to do was to get up and head back to her room and never see Maki again.

It occurred to Nico, though, as Maki's breathing slowed and steadied, that maybe whatever rules she was breaking didn't quite matter at that moment. She was tired, and Maki was already snoring gently into the crook of her neck, and as horribly as she had treated Nico there was no good reason to wake her up now. Surely Nico could deal with it after a little bit of rest. She hugged Maki closer to her, relishing the warmth that the redhead’s body radiated, and she let her eyes close.

She slept dreamlessly. It was the best night of rest she'd had in 4 years.

* * *

 

Nico jolted awake to the tune of a very familiar song; it was familiar because it was the first song of her latest single, and in her humble opinion it was quite good, but what was it doing disturbing her much-needed beauty rest? She rubbed at her eyes and opened them and it hit her all at once that she was very much not in her own hotel room. She turned her head to look at the warm weight pressing against her shoulder and was shocked all over again to see  _ Maki _ , the girl who had nearly ruined her life, stirring beside her. 

Maki's eyelashes fluttered as she slowly came awake. Nico watched as the younger girl stiffened at the muffled sound of the song playing and sat up abruptly with a quiet curse. She threw her legs over the side of the bed and rushed towards the source of the song, which turned out to be the phone in her purse that lay discarded near the door to the outside. Nico watched with interest as Maki scooped up the purse, unlocked her phone, turned off the music, dropped everything, and clambered back in bed in one fluid motion; the whole thing must have taken no more than 12 seconds. 

She remembered that Maki was not a morning person by any standard. 

Maki pulled the sheets up over her head and settled back down, this time with her back to Nico. She had not even acknowledged Nico's presence, and when Nico reached out and prodded her shoulder, all she elicited was a soft grunt. 

“Maki,” she whispered. Maki did not even twitch. “You use my song as your  _ alarm _ ?”

Maki was suddenly very awake. She turned over, blushing furiously, red creeping up her neck. “No?” The word came out more like a hopeful question than a denial.

Nico could feel a slow grin spreading across her face. “That was my new single. It just came out a week ago.”

“I-I just thought it was a good song,” Maki tried again. “I didn't know you were the singer.”

Nico raised both eyebrows skeptically. Maki was so transparent it was almost laughable, and she decided the best course of action was to ignore her lame excuses. “I thought you weren't following my career?”

Maki was quiet for a moment, then sighed and admitted, “I've bought every single and album.” 

Triumph swelled momentarily in Nico's chest, but suddenly she deflated. Maki, noticing the change in her demeanor, cocked her head.

“What?” she asked, blinking anxiously. Nico shook her head. There was a hot, prickling sensation in her nose, and she breathed in deep to quell it. 

“Why?” she asked. “Why are you listening to my music? Why did you kiss me? Why didn't you ever text me back? Why are we  _ here _ ?” As always, the unvoiced question floated between them:  _ why did you leave? _

Maki sat up, pulling the sheets with her so that they could cover her breasts in a semblance of modesty. Looking away from Nico, she said flatly, “You should probably go. I have to go to some meetings, and you have work, don’t you?”

“Bullshit,” hissed Nico. She grabbed Maki by the shoulder, forcing her to turn and face her. “You’re really going to run away  _ now _ ? After last night?” She could hardly believe that she was finally seeing Maki after so long, just for things to come to this. 

When Maki still refused to look her in the eye, Nico continued her rant. “You’re really too much, you know that? The  _ least _ you own me is an  _ explanation _ . Four years, and you didn’t call or write, not even once. I had to listen to Rin and Hanayo gush about the stupid Christmas cards they got from you every year and pretend I was getting them too. God, Maki, did you even  _ miss _ me at all?” 

Maki turned then and met her gaze, a hint of anger flashing in her stormy, violet eyes. “Of course I did,” she snapped, and Nico jerked back reflexively at the vehemence in her voice. Seeing this, she softened a little and added sadly, “Every day.” 

“Then  _ why _ -”

“ _ Because _ ,” Maki interrupted, her tone curt, “I wasn’t ready.” 

Nico paused. “Ready?” she repeated, confused. “Ready for what?”

“For  _ you _ ,” Maki said, pursing her lips in exasperation, as if her answer made anything clearer. She saw Nico’s befuddled expression and sighed. 

“Look,” she continued. “I was 16 and you were already being scouted. You were about to go pro. But you kept on visiting me anyway, and that was great. For awhile.” 

Nico cleared her throat. Not that she was impatient or anything, but Maki was taking an awfully long time to get to the point.

Maki shot her an annoyed glance. “Anyway, you were getting busier and busier, and I was getting ready to go to med school. And your visits were becoming less frequent, and most of the time they were unscheduled. It took me awhile to realize that every time you came to see me, it was at the expense of your practice and networking opportunities.”

Nico shrugged. She remembered all of this just as well as Maki did, though she didn't understand why the redhead was bringing it up. “Your point?” 

“My point is that I was holding you back!” exclaimed Maki, as if she couldn't believe Nico even had to ask. “I was the girl who was still going to school, who was making an idol break the no dating rule in her contract. Plus, my grades were suffering too. I couldn't stop thinking about you,  _ missing _ you, and knowing so many people were able to see you while I was stuck in my apartment…” 

Nico scoffed mirthlessly. “So what, you're saying you did it for  _ me _ ?” 

“No,” Maki said emphatically. “I did it because  _ I _ couldn't handle it. I was so lonely, and so  _ guilty _ all the time. I knew at that point that it wasn't going to end well. So I decided to break things off before they got bad.”

Nico processed Maki's words slowly, thinking back on certain details from the past. There had been signs, she realized, though she hadn't thought much about them before - a touch that lingered slightly too long, a quiet plea to stay just another few hours. 

“You never told me any of this,” muttered Nico. “We could have worked it out. We could have tried.” Their friends had lectured the both of them often enough about the importance of communication, yet it had all been for nothing, apparently. 

“You wouldn't have understood,” insisted Maki. “You were at your peak and nothing could touch you. I was only bringing you down.” 

Nico opened her mouth to argue, but no sound came out. To be honest, she wasn't sure she could argue with that. Memories surfaced in her mind of how exhausted she had been juggling meetings with her producer and secret rendezvous with her girlfriend, of how every so often she would joke that Maki should just quit med school and follow her around the country instead. 

“But now we're here,” Maki said, looking chagrined, and she played anxiously with the fringes of the covers. “And I don't know what to do next.”

Nico didn't either. They both sat there in silence for a minute, each lost in their own turbulent thoughts. Finally, Nico couldn't stand it anymore, and she spoke up. 

“Look, Maki,” she said, and she took the younger girl’s hand. Maki lifted her gaze and stared directly at Nico, her eyes large. “When are you leaving?”

Maki hesitated, then answered, “Day after tomorrow. 7 pm flight.”

Nico nodded. “I have a photoshoot. In the afternoon, just for a few hours, assuming they don't cancel it entirely thanks to these hickeys.” She couldn't resist making that jab, although she shushed Maki immediately when the redhead began to protest her innocence. “Yeah, yeah, whatever. I’m not sure what happens next, but all I want to know is - am I going to see you again?” 

Maki tensed, and Nico held her breath because despite how attractive and lovable she knew she was, there was always a possibility that Maki would say no for some totally dumb reason. If Maki did that, she didn’t know if she would ever breathe again. 

“Yes.” It came out more like a whisper, but Maki squeezed Nico’s hand back in affirmation. “Yes,” she said, more clearly this time, and Nico’s heart flip-flopped and she thought maybe she wouldn’t be able to breathe anyway.

“Great,” she choked out, then coughed and made a desperate attempt to collect herself. “Well of course. You’re my biggest fan, right? You wouldn’t pass up the chance to see the great Nico-Nii in person.” 

Maki rolled her eyes. “As I recall,” she said slowly, “the ‘great Nico-Nii’ wasn’t too full of herself  _ last night _ when she was begging me to eat her out.” 

Nico gasped dramatically. “That’s vulgar. You take that back.” 

Maki just laughed - a carefree, tinkling laugh that sounded so genuine that Nico had to laugh too. They both reluctantly got out of bed, and as Nico turned to watch Maki get dressed, a familiar warmth she had forgotten existed spread through her entire being, starting from her chest. 

Nico wasn’t okay, not yet. Four years of distance and pain could not be mended overnight. And there was a chance that this would only bring more pain in the future.

But somehow, Nico had a feeling that things would turn out alright.

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally supposed to be a short, 3-4k word fic, just intended as a break for me to catch my breath as I work on something potentially longer and more involved. Somehow, I kept on going and it suddenly turned into this long, convoluted ball of angst. I floundered around trying to make it work but I'm not sure it did. If you got this far, hopefully it was enjoyable!


End file.
